One half fear and self-doubt. And one half hope and blind optimism. Yep. That about sums up Taylor Swift. We may never actually see the fear and self-doubt, but according to the new issue of InStyle magazine, it's there.
The photos in this issue are spectacular. Swift in a white taffeta weddingish gown, Swift in an embroidered organza dress with a tulle skirt, Swift in a long red duchesse satin coat. And then there are the jewels. She's dripping in black diamonds, rubies, white gold and more diamonds.
But as usual with Swift, it is her words that really jump off the pages.
"I'm a bit allergic to cynics, those people who don't believe something is real unless they see it," she said. "My favorite things to believe in are things you can't see or immediately prove."
She also noted, "I feel jealousy, but I've been trying to channel it into mutual admiration and inspiration. If someone has a really great life or a really great boyfriend or career, I think, it's cool that happens. Now I have proof it can happen. Maybe that's out there for me someday."
And eventually, Swift talked about how she feels about herself.
"On the whole, I'm cool with myself," she said. "But on bad days, I can be insecure about every single thing."
I guess that's where the self-doubt comes in.
She told the magazine that every part of her has been dissected by "a blog writer or a 14-year-old girl on a comments page who says something really terrible." Yet when InStyle asked if she'd ever want to change anything about herself, she tells them no.
"I'm kind of happy being insecure," she said.
Don't think for one minute that Swift would ever confront someone trying to hurt her, though.
"As trite as this sounds, I try to be a lady about things," she said.